Fine

What are you going to do now Bev? Are you going to gain 40 pounds? Push away all of your friends? Spend the few dollars you have on anything bad for you and/or detrimental to your health?

Nah, I’m going to get up and get back to work. Those are the brakes. I controlled what I could control and I did it well, that’s all I can do and I couldn’t have done better. I don’t know what happens next. I have a serious issue with the job I’m doing now, but I’m not going to rush around searching for something else to do. I have some other things I can concentrate on. I’ll be okay. I’ll be fine. Truly.

Joy has become Lucy

It was funny to tell Dateguy about Lucy but it makes me a little sad. Like letting go a bit more. Letting Joy go. Damn, Joy really liked Peter.

But you know something? If I get this job, Unionguy will be in my life for another 5 years or so. And it would be inappropriate for us to screw around. So we could be friends, legitimately!

That’s not why I want the job, like, I probably won’t mention it in my interview, but definitely an added bonus. Manifest destiny, right?

Gotta go study! Intention will only give me the drive, the rest is manual labour. And I’m excited to do it!