I just smoked a cigarette. The first time I’ve done that sober since August 2005. And I’ve only smoked while inebriated maybe three times since then. Why did I do it, you ask? Because they were there, I guess. Because I had a long day. Because I’m feeling a little lost.
This wasn’t supposed to go this way. My life wasn’t supposed to go this way. I’m 45 fucking years old. Never married, no kids, no money, no assets, still fat, still in debt, still alone. What am I doing wrong? AND WHY THE FUCK DO I KEEP FUCKING DOING IT?!
Smoking will help, right? Shut up.