Am I repeating myself again? I tend to that. I just can’t believe I never thought to look at it like this before!
When I hung out with BFFBC I always wished she had a penis. Not because I was attracted to her. (She was my sister-in-law almost, perv.) (Also, I asked if she wanted to try being a lesbian with me and she wouldn’t go for it.)
BFFBC and I had a lot of fun together. We balanced each other out and taught each other another life view. We were each other’s witness, each other’s plus one, we went on road trips, went to movies, we hung out a couple of times a week and most weekends. That’s a relationship. The only thing missing was the sex.
Of course, I was always tragically love struck over someone. Usually poor unsuspecting fella who thought we were fuck buddies. Lol.
But you know what? In many ways that was the happiest time of my life, when I truly found a home in me.
I think in some ways I over corrected. Or maybe it’s just that I had more things I needed to learn. (I hope I always have more things I need to learn!) I thought I had it all figured out but I was kind of still trying on my new wings, testing them. I flew down the wrong path but was able to course correct when I met Unionguy and saw there was a better way. (Not to say Unionguy is the way, just that he showed me there was another way I didn’t try before.)
Anyway, the reason I got into this was to say that realizing I could consider him like BFFBC with a penis has helped me put some of this love and adoration into focus. When I remind myself it’s kind of like “Oh, right. That I can handle.”
I love BFFBC. I love Unionguy in the same way. I also like it when he touches my vagina. I like it A LOT! But, when he’s not sexing me, he’s kinda like BFFBC, with a penis. Fantastic!