“Are you okay?”

Am I okay? Well, let’s see, shall we?

  • I woke up this morning from a dream that I was being fired
  • I have been alone in this house for three days (but it feels like a month)
  • My ex tells me he has decided that he will kill himself soon
  • This dude texts me from time to time and brings me lunch and sits on my couch and makes me horny but then he goes back to his girlfriend and forgets I exist
  • I haven’t made any sales this month which means no commission which means I’ll barely be able to pay my bills
  • I have no money for Christmas
  • I have no money to sign up for my January courses
  • I’m so fucking fat I don’t know what to do with myself
  • I have had a debilitating stress headache non-stop for days
  • I can’t stop crying
  • I have no one to talk to
  • I’m so alone
  • And I’m not allowing myself to drink or smoke pot for a while

So, TO ANSWER YOUR MOTHER FUCKING SHIT QUESTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks for asking.

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